Sinning in LA

“So what if the score is against me? I’ve been on the battlefield for a long time. I suppose I always will be--just my nature.”

These are the words of Hunter S. Thompson which close Ancient Gonzo Wisdom, and I’m reminded of them as I’m standing in the corner of an art gallery, fresh from an argument. There are places and times for things, and though I may not be particularly tactful at times, I don’t belabor points. I’ve never been able to shuffle things beneath the surface, and I’m terrible at cards. This fact has been repeated to me during the row, even though I’ve never played the person opposite at any game. Of anything.

This book of wisdom that I’ve spent this last few weeks of my life with is a collection of The Good Doctor’s interviews with various journalists, as well as groups of students, throughout his career. “He was the same on stage as he was in the kitchen, which was something I loved about him,” said Anita Thompson, who edited the book. “He was a teenage girl trapped in the body of an elderly dope fiend. whether he was by his typewriter or in front of 3,000 people.” With many turns as well as consistencies, the book provides a look at the man behind the typewriter. The conversations shaped by others, not himself. You get the idea that Hunter is used to being in control, even when out of his head. Sometimes dark and distant, but usually very witty and charming, he’s allowed to show himself, rather than the cartoon caricature that had been created of him by others. “Turning Hunter into a cartoon really pissed him off. Be careful, and accept that it might happen to you guys [at SiLA]. The creation of a stereotype and then marketing it.”

“The most difficult part of the book was cutting,” said Anita. “It started with a thousand page manuscript or more. I wanted to show how he evolved and then changed, but I wanted to keep some of the repetition in, to show how Hunter held the line through his entire life.”

Hunter, a master at journalism, could still manage to be misunderstood. It’s something we all live with. The more risks you take, the more you are exposing yourself.

And so here we are, taking ourselves on the road, this traveling band of Sinning in LA gypsies. She was certainly our first destination on the map, a sparking lamp to shine over the rest of the unknown path ahead.

“Thank God somebody’s doing this,” she said. “Everything happens for a reason, and it does take courage.”

And I’ll tell you this, dear readers: We’ve assembled a wild bunch here. As Hunter showed us, you can really speak the truth when you’re wearing a mask, but I’m not sure if these are creations or just actual nutters.

\We have a smooth-tongued reggae rocker who has never once seen Jamaica but who sleeps on the beach, his head on a turntable, and says all of his sacraments to Jah. There’s one who wears dark sunglasses so often that I couldn’t tell you what his eyes look like, and I’ve tried calling him so many times that I think we’ve stopped speaking entirely.

And we’ve found a complete loose cannon who may still be lost amongst the dust in Burning Man. Women want to be with this man, and men want to be him. You’ve got to find him first, which doesn’t seem hard with that giant coat . . .

Of course, myself and the other editors have learned to let this group go, led by their hearts and their passions. The rest of the world is off looking for safety and comfort, especially in these times. But if you’re looking in that direction, you’ve wandered to the darkness here. One of my friends once told me that “If I’m ever arrested, it will be with you. But if I’m ever having the greatest time in my life, it will also be with you.” Multiply that by three and mix in some dangerous chemicals, and you’ve got our creative team.

Some of our travelers like to imbibe in drugs and drink. As did Hunter. “Though he used it as a tool to get a different perspective on things,” said Anita. “He genuinely did not recommend his lifestyle to other people. There’s nothing more he despised than a drunk in the room, and he really didn’t like that behavior. if his lifestyle would interfere with his writing, he would back down and start to straighten out. The most important thing to him was his writing.” When asked about Smash LeFunk and his tendency to shoot entire festivals while consuming gallons of Ballentine’s and God only knows what else, she said that “he couldn’t do that unless he had the skills before the adventure. He must be very talented.”

And he is. Like our team here, “Hunter liked things that would open up other parts of his mind.”

His mind was constantly turning, and he needed those substances to slow it down a little bit. To make it in to a manageable wavelength. He was the most observant and sensitive person I’ve ever met.

"He always was sensitive to what was going on around him, and he was constantly intaking information during the day. Even at night, CNN or the History Channel were on.”

I have spent many nights sleeping to the sound of the television, having dreams infused with the events of the day, or the salesmen that haunt the late-night dial. I guess it’s the same reason that I only sleep when my body can’t handle being awake any longer and I collapse in to the bed. I don’t want to miss anything.

“Hunter was most dedicated to the craft of writing. The actual compilation of a story, to make that story brilliant, and to give an accurate account and tell the truth. That would sometimes become crazy, but that’s because the truth was crazy. The campaign trail, the trip to Vegas with Oscar Acosta, they were that crazy. For example, Fear and Loathing he wrote stone sober. The misconception is that he would take a gram of cocaine and drink a bottle of Wild Turkey and that was the key to his style. Actually, it was the other way around. Because he was so good, he could have the lifestyle and not let it interfere with his writing. He took great pride that he could tell the story of what it’s like to be on ether and acid and be at a DA’s conference and the way it really happened. He was very proud that he could remember and describe it after the fact.”

“Hell’s Angels, he wrote the first half in six months. Then he looked at the calendar and realized he had four days to turn it in. Before he found out he could push deadlines, and instead of giving up, he rented a hotel room outside San Francisco and stayed up for four days with some Dexedrine and a bottle of Wild Turkey and wrote the second half. The second half is fast-moving, high-paced storytelling. Many people say it launched his career. It was the muscle memory of writing every single day for the previous 15 years since he was a kid. The dedication and the hard work that came before that.”

His experience with Hell’s Angels reminds me of every homework assignment I had between approximately 1983 and 2001. Without the drugs and drinks, though I do believe I was heavily caffeinated and also trying to amplify my serotonin levels.

I also recently lost my father at the beginning of this year, and I was curious to see how she was dealing with the loss of someone so close. My mother has talked about being unable to move back in to the house they had planned on retiring in, because it holds too many memories in every corner.

Surprisingly, she said that “it brings a comfort. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I haven’t moved his toothbrush, or his bathrobe. Even after four and a half years. It’s painful, but being away was more painful. It’s my home. I have animals and forty acres to attend to, so it’s a full time job. We had a pact, Hunter and I, so I always work for him, for the things we both believe in. He left a good road map. We lived together for only five years, so I’m just getting started.”

I was motivated by her courage, but then again, she married a man who had a “never call 911” rule. She also finished her International Studies degree by commuting to Columba University in New York once every month. Quite a feat in addition to the two books she’s already published and the aforementioned farm management.

“You’re Hunter’s people,” she told us.

I’m glad you’re taking your work seriously and Hunter’s. I appreciate that and I know he would too. You have his blessing I’m sure.

The score might be against us, and the battlefield might be treacherous at times. When you’re working closely with some creative and talented fireworks, you have to be careful of the occasional outburst. But wait for the beautiful explosions.

Welcome to Sinning in LA.